He said I’m still his soulmate but also said some really shitty stuff. Press J to jump to the feed. Be a part of something that cares about who you are. This episode must last 2 weeks or more. I suppose I went so long because I was always a good kid, did well in school and behaved, never got into too much trouble. What I used to destroy in 4-6 months, I can do in 8 days or less now. It was not what they told me it would be and i had to fight for my freedom a week later. I had to sit in a room, say nothing, and let other people decide if i was sane or not. Bipolar disorder can be treated. Sorry about the second message. “I was fiery and ferocious, capable of lighting up a room or just as easily burning it down.” —Julie Kraft. Finally! I decided then and there i was going to try and figure out what was really wrong with me. And since so many people think bipolar people are artistic, and I can't draw, then the diagnosis must be wrong. All of these medications are known to increase the risk of weight gain except lamotrigine. No two people experience bipolar disorder in the exact same way. Read it. Treatment for bipolar disorder aims to reduce the severity and number of episodes of depression and mania to allow as normal a life as possible. it is funny, it almost seems like my life is worse since i found out. Hello, I’m Mailia, a wife, a mother of four and a nurse. I would strongly suggest getting back on meds. Although the association between bipolar disorder and alcohol use disorder isn't clearly understood, these factors likely play a role: Since then I found a shrink that gets me. Bipolar disorder is a mental health condition that involves changes in moods and other symptoms. I rarely see/feel in color. It was different, and I just knew that I was more than depressed. Even without treatment, there may have symptom-free periods characterized by a stable mood. 2. I am not currently on any pills as most of them increase the suicidal thoughts. Increased urination, 5lb weight gain, increased thirst. Episodes of depression tend to last longer, often 6 to 12 months. (easy to do when your brain tells you all day everyday how you can kill yourself with an object just by looking at it). I wouldn't advise staying off medication, to be honest. I might add that my mom lived undiagnosed and unmedicated for nearly 50 years before being diagnosed during a severe and psychotic depression. I sincerely wish you all the best with whatever decision you go with. I had struggled with sleeping, depression, and high every symptoms throughout my life. A Reddit to share information about who you are, how you think, and what helps you cope in life. I had 10 relatively stable years (no mania, seasonal depression of varying severity, never as paralyzingly deep as before though). Medications for bipolar disorder include mood stabilizers, antipsychotics and antidepressants. I always knew i battled depression and suicidal tendencies, but after this "event" in my life i was so bad i opted to go to a mental hospital. Your doctor may refer you to a psychiatrist, who will talk to you about your thoughts, feelings and behavior patterns. Even though I had studied bipolar I'm school, it took a few days for it to click. I have lost 257 pounds in a year and even something as awesome as that barely shows up in my thinking with any joy or color. I’d also like to add how oblivious I was to the two sides of bipolar disorder. I rarely go manic "happy" but when i do i try to enjoy it. I … How worn down it makes me feel. If a person is not treated, episodes of bipolar-related mania can last for between 3 and 6 months. I am, however, trying to make the best of it. Reserpine – an herb that may treat bipolar mania but probably only adjunctive to lithium. So there wasn't much to complain about my behavior to raise questions. Went to my primary care doc asking for antidepressants. Cookies help us deliver our Services. Then after getting therapy for depression, I got back up doing well in life, and for seemingly no reason I'd go back being depressed again. To determine if you have bipolar disorder, your evaluation may include: 1. It is making me attempt to live life in order to fight my brain and actually try to enjoy some moments before i ever shuffle off my mortal coil. We are a community here not just a help page. During … Only after 3 years of work did I get more severely out of balance and I think it was because I was unhappy with the job, where my life was, and trying to take care of mom who had episodes of suicidal depression darker than any I had. Almost the exact same story here, with the addition of visual and tactile hallucinations. I hate living this way. The irritability.. agitation.. incredible onset of a deep deep depression made me realize there was something else going on here.. Patient Stories Malia’s Story. I would go months feeling good and doing very well in school and in life in general, but then after some time, for seemingly no reason, I'd crash into depression. I've been on lithium for 4 years with no problems. Thanks for understanding) Posted this in bipolar as well but idk.. My old dr told me that I am a case that needs to take their meds. 10 Actualities of Living with Bipolar II Without Medication. Anyone who has experienced two or more episodes of bipolar disorder generally is considered to have lifelong bipolar disorder, where the goal focuses not only on treating current symptoms but also preventing future episodes. It was the darkest period of my life. I realized that I had a serious problem when SSRI's were causing manic episodes for me. I've given up on medication (lamotrigine) after using it for 11 years or so in relative stability, but then becoming very depressed and later hypomanic due to life situation. I cant come to terms with the fact that the anger ... the blindingly catastrophic earth shattering rage I get is a sign of mania, because I've had full on manic episodes before too, days at a time ... fuck, I really need to see someone. It takes more work though than poppin' pills. Now I can look back to times when I think I had hypomania. It's not more subtle, it's just a 90/10 ration between depression and mania, respectively. These medications even out the troughs and the peaks of mood swings to keep you on a more even keel. No one wants bipolar and, certainly, no one wants to take one or more psychiatric medications. Since the “highs” are not a full manic episode it is also referred to as “soft bipolar”, though this term is a little misleading. However, more than 60% of people with the diagnosis stop taking their medication at some point. Since I don't have much responsibilities or a family I chose the option of no medication and facing my affliction head on. Following standard psychiatric practice would likely have involved a change in meds resulting in the addition of another drug next to lamotrigine which I chose due to low side effects. My husband realized it. I was really depressed. One day I just had an epiphany, that I had read about my sort of behavior before, and pretty much after a night of thinking and research became fairly certain that I had either cyclothymia or bp2 (which of course I corroborated with professionals). I got out of there and decieded i was going to kill myself again. Lifestyle changes. Treatment options for bipolar disorder. Got dumped today by a guy I’ve been on and off with 2 years. I don't use drugs or alcohol since my diagnosis, and even though I've had multiple issues with my medication regiment, I've made appropriate adjustments with the help of my psychiatrist. And people with bipolar II don't always experience one type of episode or the other. Since December 2017 I've tried around 25 different medications (mix of antidepressants, stabilizers, anxiety meds, antipsychotics, and probably some others I can't even remember) and most recently lithium. Every time I do it seems I start to self medicate with hard drugs and it always turns into a disaster. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. For me, I wasn't actually diagnosed with bipolar until I was 31 yrs. I have bipolar II and after the typical run of trial and error, found that Seroquel (at night) works well. I think we all thought we did until the visit with the Ward, PD, MD. Bipolar II is diagnosed when a person experiences episodes of hypomania and depression. My mum sent me to a shrink for my "anger issues" and there it was. It belongs to the piperazine class of phenothiazines. Press J to jump to the feed. Lamictal (lamotrigine): “I've tried almost all meds for depression/bipolar but no success. These only lasted about 2 months. Some really unpleasant emotional breakdowns kind of make sense when it's laid out to see. It means they are on drugs. A friend got me to try some cannabis and for the first time in a long time life had some color in it. No I have tried a couple of times and it has always ended up being a major destructive disaster. After 4 years, I'm dealing with that right now and will most likely have to change to a yet undetermind medication. BP NOS / C-PTSD / TL anomaly / CRPS. Recently i thought about giving seriquil (sp) a chance, but both my shrink and i are not sure it would be the right thing to do. I just find them fascinating. For best results, medication needs to be combined with therapy sessions and the instigation of good routines. It sounds awful but wish I was manic so at least I could feel a little out of touch with reality. Now I have a fuck-it list (bucket list parody) of things i want to do before i try to kill myself again. It was more terrifying than almost anything you can imagine. Psychiatry is still in the dark ages if you ask me and can barely be called science. I love meditation, writing, whittling, and playing with my dog, but they are just crutches. I don't mean to sound ignorant at all, I'm just really looking into the disorders and I'm curious what made you go "this is different". I was embarrassed. Sure, they are acting out and have symptoms similar to those experiencing psychosis, but that doesn't mean they are schizo. Depression/anxiety treatments triggered mania in me so they decided instead of having depression and an anxiety disorder it was bipolar simply on drug reactions. Cookies help us deliver our Services. Just a note I have a tendency towards full blown mania with auditory hallucinations. Pharmacology is Magic! Has anyone had much success following this route? It was after my ex-fiance left me. Feeling like I wanna self destruct. I tapered off Lexapro last year because I felt fantastic, obviously there was nothing wrong me me!! Care to tell a bit more? When effective, medication … Medication is a daily reminder of the illness you don’t want. Not after seeing what bipolar can do if you let it run rampant without medication and proper management. Only twice did i start to get "violent". I can't tell you how much I appreciate hearing from all of you. Bipolar Facts. These emotional peaks and valleys can last for weeks or months. I've got a pretty good coping mechanism, so life is okay. At the age of 36, after decades of struggle with erratic mood swings—periods of mania followed by debilitating depression—and ample doses of anxiety and frustration, Julie Kraft, a mother of three, was finally diagnosed with bipolar II disorder in 2010. old (I'm 35 now). Had to look it up myself. I have more energy, less irritable, less appetite and increased sexual desire. I started getting bad anxiety attacks on it and stopped taking it. Any of the above medications may be prescribed for someone with bipolar disorder who also suffers from anxiety, even if the anxiety is not from an actual anxiety disorder. Bipolar disorder is known for causing severe shifts in mood that can include bouts of depression and mania. It is usually long term and continuous. While it is understandable that some people may want to manage bipolar disorder without medication, it’s just typically not … I'm not artistic. I’m bipolar , 44 female. To receive a bipolar 2 disorder diagnosis, you must have had at least one major depressive episode. I was a psych student at the time, and had read extensively about diagnosing various mental disorders. It seems like bipolar II is a lot more subtle than bipolar I. I realized I was when I had my first manic phase. I never understood why this would ever be a way to diagnose anyone. You may also fill out a psychological self-assessment or questionnaire. I tried to off myself for like the 6th time. medication was the single most important factor in my recovery. Sure, they are acting out and have symptoms similar to those experiencing psychosis, but that doesn't mean they are schizo. My doctors have said I'm a med lifer, until someone develops a cure. I started going to therapy for anger issues that arose on a regular cycle, every few weeks, then mentioned one of my friends suggested jokingly I might be bipolar (we were really close for 1.5 years) and I brought it up because I myself had considered it. Edit: Thank you all so much for your answers. I'm currently trying to get some control of this affliction and prevent the worst excesses of mania and depression through careful and mindful living. If you've had proper mania, not just hypomania, you're not BP2. If after the drugs stop, and the psychosis stop, then they are no longer suffering adverse side effects of the drugs, then they aren't schizophrenic. I am going to stay on my meds now that I am stable. How bipolar episodes cycle and present for an individual depends “on all kinds of things,” Dr. Galynker says. UK guidance for the treatment of bipolar disorder has an emphasis on medication. It made me wonder whether my many years of relative stability were despite the medication and more due to having a pretty easygoing life. When I was finally diagnosed and put on medications, that choas in my life subsided to a level that I don't think I've ever experienced. Bipolar 2 disorder involves hypomanic episodes. No one gets what it is like to live with my brain. Treatment for bipolar II disorder usually involves a combination of medication and psychotherapy. Approximately 10 million people in the United States have BD. My life is sepia colored. My therapist recognized that my behavior was typical of bipolar II, rather than just depression. It was a bad decision in that I crashed and burned over the months I wasn't on it. It was too subtle for me to catch. I'm not a fan of meds at all, I don't know who really is, who walks around rockin' a Lithium hoodie, or walkin' around in their Efexor sneakers, topped with a ballcap with Neurontin logo, but I know, speaking only for myself, that I need them to keep the chance of having a stable life. I was diagnosed with depression but after the meds made me worse my pdoc made the announcement that I was BP2. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. Most manic attacks are ranting and raving and not controlling what i say. Modern psychs for the most part seem to only involve themselves with DSM diagnoses, medication, and monitoring, which really bothers me, especially since many of the meds have questionable efficacy and we don't even understand the mechanism of action of them or the disorders they are supposed to treat. This led me to re-evaluate life and over the years my faith in psychiatry was severely diminished due to what I had seen it do people close to me and the things I read from critical psychiatrists. And when I was diagnosed, the diagnosis of bipolar disorder made perfect sense of what was my choatic life, especially my excessive use of alcohol and narcotics. I just want to add: crutches are okay for getting me out of a bad situation, but I'd rather not be there in the first place. They made me totally manic and really suicidal. I don't know what type you have (I'm Bipolar I), so that might mean something different in terms of the option of being off of medications. Why was I still taking this pill??? Some lifestyle adaptations can also help, alongside the medication. During a study abroad session in the summer I had my first ever extreme manic episode. During those episodes though I had no idea what was happening, not in the sense that I knew something was wrong, but in the sense that it didn't occur to me that something was wrong. Bipolar disorder isn't about mindful living; I've had psychologists tell me over and over that medication is basically the best way to combat these things. I don't know what type you have (I'm Bipolar I), so that might mean something different in terms of the option of being off of medications. Reading about critical psychiatry also made me lose a lot of faith in how our current system works and medication is used without much other treatment in many cases. Thus, continuation and maintenance of (ongoing) therapy is often recommended as treatment for bipolar disorder. There were sparse times where I was seemingly in the middle of the two but I'm usually more on the edge of any given spectrum. The tragedy is that, when the disorders co-occur, the diagnoses are often missed. Bipolar disorder and fatigue. It sucks sometimes feeling like a lab rat with these medications, but for a person like me, going off of medication to control my bp would definitely put me right back in the choatic life I had suffered with for so many years. Yes and no. By definition. Be a part of something that cares about who you are. old (I'm 35 now). Medication is a key part of managing your bipolar disorder.If you feel like it doesn’t work as well as it should, doesn’t help at all, or has side effects that are too much for you, don’t quit. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. Afterwards not so many. My combination of low dose meds(little depakote, little risperidal) + supplements(high-epa omega-3 for depression , magnesium for mood stabilization) does help me a lot. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder late 2017, but had my first episode somewhere between 2011 and 2013. I doubt I'll ever do without them. You're the first one to say it might be possible. 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